Thought of the Day, 3-13-16: Stranded on a Road

Hey all,

I found myself with my car left on the side of the road today.  Gratefully, I wasn't killed yesterday:  my serpentine belt and tensioner had snapped on the highway.  Almost suddenly, I couldn't push brake down; the only way to stop the car was to slowly skid to a stop.  It was very dangerous and I was uncertain what would happen

I would have tried to make it to my friend's house, just a few short minutes away, but when belts go, so does the whole car.  My steering wheel would't turn.  I was left with no choice but to leave my car at the side of the road and find help the next day

This was one of the more frightening moments I've ever experienced, because it very viscerally showed me what a lack of control meant.  If I had not reacted quickly enough or risked driving the car further, I would have likely been in a bad accident.  I feel distinctly blessed that much worse didn't happen

Luckily, I did have a good friend (more like a brother) who could give me his time to fix the car, on the highway, amidst a downpour of rain and an almost incessant rush of cars going past (the longest period of inactivity may have been literally 30 seconds).  The parts cost roughly $80 and we fixed it within a few hours

I've driven this car with a constant fear for the last few years.  It's older, and although the engine is sound, it has caused me much grief with it's persistent issues.  Many of these are the familiar rut of an old car but that is precisely the problem

I don't have the means to be vigilant about fixes, and so I must live in a constant state of preparation for the fluxes.  Rather than getting angry during situations like this, I've learned to gather equanimity and use it to guide me to making change in my own life.  The next car I have will be much better maintained, and the call of this ashram is to get myself in better order financially, mentally, and spiritually

I won't have to live in fear of my own instruments.  This is not to say that we must insulate ourselves from all pain and stress; indeed, much of it can be healthy and buffers against atrophy of mind and body.  It is to say that there are only so many times you can cheat death and cataclysm.  I've been lucky enough to "learn the hard way" without cracking my skull open.  It's a process I will apply to all of my life's learning, as it means that even the smallest moments can have magnified meaning!